Mormon History Revealed
Leaked: The real account of young Joseph Smith Jr.

After months of personal study from both the scriptures and the book he found in his father’s belongings, Joseph Smith became determined to ask of God himself about the truthfulness of religion. In his own words he wrote, “I retired to the woods to make the attempt. It was on the morning of a beautiful, clear day, early in the spring of eighteen hundred and twenty. It was the first time in my life that I had made such an attempt to pray vocally. I had retired to the place where I had previously designed to go, and finding myself alone, I removed my clothes to bare my soul and to kneel blameless before God.”

As Joseph began to pray out loud some other power overcame him and tried to have its way with him. It seized him, and though he could not see it, he felt a tongue upon his tongue so that he could not speak. Thick darkness gathered around him and for a moment he did not know if he were doomed for sudden destruction or to be taken advantage of in sexual torment. He was both fearful and curious. He wrote in his journals what happened next.

“I was ready to submit myself to this unknown power that held me bound—but then just at this moment, I saw a pillar of light exactly over my head, above the brightness of the sun, which descended gradually until it fell upon me.

“It no sooner appeared than I found myself delivered from the unknown darkness which held me bound. When the light rested upon me I saw two Personages, whose brightness and glory defy all description, standing above me in the air. One of them spake unto me, calling me by name and I instantly felt my loins become turgid with arousal. He said, pointing to the other—“This is My Beloved Son. Hear Him!”

Joseph Smith’s purpose of going to inquire of the Lord was to know which of all the sects was right, that he might know which to join. But before Joseph could compose himself and ask the question, their robes came open and the personages exposed their nakedness to him, fully engorged with arousal the same as him. Therefore, Joseph could not get possession of himself to be able to speak.

 Joseph Smith learns the naked truth of things.

But the personages knew of young Joseph’s desires, and the circumcised of the two personages counseled him saying that he must join none of the religious sects, for they were all wrong. Saying “they draw near to me with their lips, but their hearts and desires are far from me, they teach only for doctrines the commandments of men, but they deny the true power I have for them.”

Never before had the young and innocent Joseph felt so much desire and yearning between men, yet they forbid him to touch himself or to give in to his desires, saying that the time for such things would come later, and he would be fulfilled in ways “which cannot be shared at this time.”

The personages then went away in the same way they had appeared. Joseph concluded the account in his Journal saying, “When I awoke and came around, I found myself lying on my back, still naked and leaking from my penis, looking up into heaven. I had no strength; but soon recovering in some degree, I walked in the direction of home, leaving my clothes behind, and fell back asleep under a tree, until my father found me there and woke me.”


Mormon History Revealed
Leaked: The real account of young Joseph Smith Jr. 

Even as a young man Joseph Smith was fascinated with the concept of religion, and pondered earnestly which church to join. During this time though, in the 1800’s, new religions were springing up all over the place. Joseph could literally attend a new church service every weekend, all of them proclaiming to have the true fullness of the gospel, which only added to his confusion of which to join. For the teachers of religion of the different sects understood the same passages of scripture so differently as to destroy all confidence.

In his own written words Joseph once said, “What is to be done? Who of all these parties are right; or, are they all wrong together? If any of them be right, which is it, and how shall I know it?”

While laboring under the extreme difficulties caused by the different religionist parties, Joseph spent a lot of his free time reading from the Bible to find an answer to his questions.

One day, while working around the barn, he by chance came across an old book among some of his father’s possessions. It had a black binding with no title, but the passages inside spoke about early rituals performed by a secretive group of men in antiquity.

Many of the rituals were of secret handshakes among the members, private ceremonies and prayers, and included everything from how to dress to how to become involved in the affairs of political power behind the scenes. The book also stated that the rituals were necessary to discover eternal truths about God and religion.

Joseph stayed up late many a night to read the passages by candlelight in personal study. By doing so he found many detailed accounts about sexual encounters to be performed only between men, only in secret, and only among those with proper authority to do so. These accounts left quite an impression on the naïve young man and he often found himself lost in fantasy from the words.

“Never did any passage of written word come with more power than this did at this time to mine.” Joseph wrote in his private journals. “It seemed to enter with great force into every feeling of my heart and a burning desire deep in my groin. I reflected on it again and again, night after night.”

At length the young Joseph Smith came to the conclusion that he must either remain in darkness and confusion, acting out the rituals alone in his room, or he must somehow find out the truthfulness of these words.




Mormon History Revealed
Ordination By Insemination, Taught By Joseph Smith!

A private meeting was broadcast from the Holy of Holies in the Salt Lake City Temple today, 3 weeks after the Mormon church held its 183rd General Conference. The men in attendance learned from top Mormon brass that there has indeed been a revelation given in response to last week’s leaked documents.

According to a source in attendance, the men were told that the revelation outlines a detailed strategy the church leadership will follow to control fallout from this knowledge. The men were also briefed on the documents known to have been part of the leak, including the private writings of Joseph Smith titled “The History of The One True Church.” The following excerpt from Joseph’s writings was then read by the presiding area authority:


Leaked excerpt from Joseph Smith’s personal records:
What really happened to God’s valiant servants on that day in June of 1829

On a beautiful sunny afternoon, Joseph Smith and Oliver Cowdery went to the nearby hills to pray about the lineage of Priesthood authority. They found a quiet grove of trees and knelt to pray.

As they were thus conversing with the heavens above a white cloud appeared to them, and in the midst of the cloud stood three men shoulder to shoulder wearing exquisitely white robes. One of them spoke to Joseph, introducing them as Peter, James, and John saying;

“We have come to bestow upon you the keys of authority through the seed of our loins.”

No sooner had he finished speaking when all three of their robes came open to reveal their muscled bodies and fully engorged cocks. Young Josephs eyes nearly popped out of his head as he was drawn toward them as if under a spell. As he was already on his knees he wasted no time lapping at the long thick cocks that were in his face.

Joseph would slide the tip of his tongue up the length of the shaft before popping the whole thing in his mouth, gulping it down his throat as best he could. Back and forth he went from one to the other, first John, then Peter, and then James. Drool began to form on Josephs chin as the three men huddled around him, moaning in pleasure each time Joseph’s lips tightened around their throbbing cocks. Oliver removed his clothes and began to play with his own cock, fully hard, as he watched his friend work so eagerly for what he knew was building between the men’s legs.

One of the men, John, spread himself out on a patch of grass while Joseph instinctively buried his face between his legs and sticking his tight round butt up in the air. Peter licked at the young man’s puckered hole with his tongue to moisten him up, feeling the boys cheeks quiver in anticipation. Peter then pressed the tip of his hard cock against the round hole and slowly began to push in, his thickness nearly splitting the boy open, but Peter continued to slowly push in until he was buried in as deep as he could go. Joseph tried to moan from the pain but his mouth was full of cock and he could barely breathe.

Both James and Oliver pounded their dicks as they watched the show unfold before them. Joseph’s young butt took a beating from behind as Peter continued to thrust inside him. But no matter how hard Peter fucked him not once did Joseph remove his hungry mouth from John’s rock hard dick.

Peter was the first to approach orgasm, breathing heavy in Joseph’s ear as he felt himself erupt deep inside the eager lad. But it was Joseph who was then pushed beyond ecstasy, pushed beyond anything he had ever experienced before. His bosom was filled with joy that spread through his entire body, burning his insides with pleasure. It was then that John came too and Joseph swallowed him down as fast as he could. The experience of the two glorified beings cumming deep inside Joseph was so powerful that Joseph too came at the same time, and his orgasm brought him closer to God than any time before, surrounding him in light and ecstasy.

Soaking in sweat and sperm, the Lord’s chosen servant Joseph was too exhausted to move. He spread out and watched as Oliver Cowdery receive the same power that he too had just gained.

Joseph has the priesthood fucked into him!


1116128Mormon History Announcement!
Leaked: Revelation Coming on Sexual Priesthood Rites

A leaked excerpt from Joseph Smith Jr.’s private memoirs exposes what has known all along. The graphic details of how the higher priesthood was restored to Joseph Smith and Oliver Cowdery are clearly spelled out in this provocative document.

In response to this situation, top Mormon leaders are quietly telling select members of the priesthood hierarchy that the prophet has received a revelation. Our sources say there are plans to share the details of this revelation at a closed-door Priesthood Session during the Church’s Semi-Annual General Conference this October.

One source quoted a top official in the church as saying, “the church’s recent announcement and revelation allowing women to pray in General Conference will pale in significance to this new revelation.” has reason to believe that this announcement may have to do with the controversial practice known as “ordination by insemination.”

“If that is in fact the case,” explained Bishop Stevenson, a member of the order known as Videntium Oraculi, “this would not be a new revelation to the members of our order. We have known about ordination by insemination since June of 1829 when Joseph Smith and Oliver Cowdery were ordained through insemination by the heavenly personages, Peter, James, and John.”

While the forthcoming revelation may well focus on “Ordination by Insemination,” there is considerable speculation that additional elements of church history will also come to light.

An inside source says the Mormon leadership will prepare a private network of priesthood leaders in advance of the announcement this fall. These preparatory meetings will be privately broadcast from a special room in the Salt Lake Temple known as the Holy of Holies. Our sources will be in attendance at these private priesthood sessions, and we will share what they learn immediately following each session.

True Priesthood Restored

Joseph Smith’s full account has been leaked. has recently received a treasure trove of leaked memos and Salt Vault records indicating the Mormon church is preparing for an “imminent revelation on the true order of the priesthood.” We will begin publishing these private internal memos and records on the website each Sunday.

*Peter, James and John ordaining Joseph Smith and Oliver Cowdery to the Melchizedek Priesthood through insemination!

Last week in Queerty!


Porn Video “Uncovers” Mitt Romney’s Secret Mormon Gay-Sex Past

Paul Jackson, the mastermind behind the porn site (NSFW) has supposedly uncovered a deep, dark—and gay—secret in the Church of Latter Day Saints.

According to a press release from the site, an elite Mormon group known as the Videntium Oraculi, or the True Order of the Priesthood, practices “ordination by insemination.” During initiation into the order, young LDS lads are “[subjected] to extensive sessions of sexual intercourse with their priesthood brothers and elders.”

Jackson claims presidential hopeful Mitt Romney participated in “ordination by insemination” and features a clip on the site showing a Romney-looking fellow, ahem, indoctrinating a young initiate.

An anonymous source from within the order claims that Mitt Romney had formerly been involved with the Videntium Oraculi, and was ordained via insemination while a student at Brigham Young University. The same source also claimed that Mitt Romney recently, as a bishop of the church, had anally raped dozens of young men and boys.

Romney, through a spokesman, vehemently denied the accusation that he had been anally violated as a missionary youth in France, or had been the perpetrator of such acts. “this is an absolutely outrageous attack against the Mormon faith,” said an obviously nervous and agitated spokesman. Speaking off the record, another aid to Romney said, “this is our worst nightmare…that the truth of Mormonism would finally come to light…don’t quote me on that, this is completely off the record!”

…considering some of the homoerotic shenanigans Mitt got up to in his youth, this does kind of sound like something he’d be a part of.

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